Sunday, January 6, 2008
The Golden Compass
The Golden Compass fucking reeks because it has one of the worst endings in the history of storytelling. It actually discards the book's cliffhanger ending in favor of a bores-cliffs-to-tears ending. That is how Chris Weitz rewards us for watching two hours of his poorly animated CGI animals, and the talented British actors enslaved to them.
AVPR
I just noticed every movie I put up here is a bad horror film I had unreasonably high expectations for.
That doesn't negate the fact that these movies are truly, deeply, offensively awful in the worst ways. Horror has the potential to be a good genre, see the original Omen, the Exorcist, etc.
AVPR sucks because it exists in a universe that shouldn't exist in the first place. Tying together the plotlines of four Alien movies and two Predators isn't interesting. Or relevant.
It's retarded. It's like seeing Michael Myers grow up for forty minutes in the Halloween remake. It makes the monster unscary to know a lot about it. Especially when the story conceived for it is hokey and boring.
That doesn't negate the fact that these movies are truly, deeply, offensively awful in the worst ways. Horror has the potential to be a good genre, see the original Omen, the Exorcist, etc.
AVPR sucks because it exists in a universe that shouldn't exist in the first place. Tying together the plotlines of four Alien movies and two Predators isn't interesting. Or relevant.
It's retarded. It's like seeing Michael Myers grow up for forty minutes in the Halloween remake. It makes the monster unscary to know a lot about it. Especially when the story conceived for it is hokey and boring.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)